i found it so weird what this abdullah guy did, but i actually listened to him and right now im on my way home.
i entered my room and changed to my pjs, i lighted up a cigarette, yes a cigarette since im trying to stop smoking weed. and right then i started to think deeply of what mooki told me that about yousif. should i go for it? or not.. the feeling i had for him is weird its not like hes a stranger but i cant just imagine him as a husband.. my husband.
and what if that abdullah dude told on me not to my brother to yousif? i know he wont tell my brother but he can tell his friend right? ugh what do i even care if he told him or not. who am i kidding i care about yosif, i know that i have feekings for yosif but i don't know what those feelings are.
i got tired, sprayed some air freshener, brushed my teeth and went to bed.
next afternoon,
i woke up around 2 pm. did my business and took a shower , then i went down the stairs and found mooki in the living room.
i went to him saying: hla b abdulmalik; and giving him a good morning hug.
mooki: weird !
me: what?
mooki: you !
me: me?
mooki: yes, tegoleli abdulmalik, giving me a hug?
me: what im always sweet :( and your name faj2a golto 3adi
mooki: ummm, esh 7tswi L youm?
me: ma adri lsa
mooki: tbi n5rj?
me: 3adi
mooki: m3a baba w mama?
me: no
mooki: why?
me: i dont know maba
mooki: whats your problem?
me: with who?
mooki: with them!
me: madri i just feel weird and out of place around them.
mooki: and why is that? you know you are their daughter, and if you believed the lies i usually tell you when we were younger that you are not my sister and we found you near the mosque tra its not true wallah! *saying the last part with a slight laugh*
me: of course i didnt believe you and i wont forgive you for what you had done, do you know you kept me crying all night *giving him a death stare*
mooki: hahhaaha you did you deserve it!
me: no!
mooki: yes!
*silence*
mooki: noor..
me: haa?
mooki: did you think about what yosif told me?
me: yes..
mooki: and?
me: mooki i dont know.. i do have feelings but i dont know what are they! sometimes its a yes.. but then i rethink about it and here its a no!
mooki: why?
me: i dont know give me some time i rethink and i will give you the answer
mooki: okay 7bebty
me: umm mooki t3rf wa7d esmo 3bdallah al X
mooki: ewa leesh?
me: umm bas bs2l
mooki: keef t3rfe?
me: la bas ...
mooki: bas?
me: o5to m3aya fel mdrsa..
mooki: 3bdallah ma3ndo o5t gddk !
me: *shit* umm heya mo gdi bas a3rfha
mooki: okay..
Sunday;
in the school;
hayat: heeeey
me: ahlan!
i just took a seat and focused on my math lesson.
in the break;
lamia: noor..
me: ummm
lamia: come with me
i went with her to the bathroom;
she entered in one and she called me to go in with her. i went.
she had her hands on her right uniform pocket, she got whats in their, and of course, what will be in there instead of weed?
me: are you seriously bringing the weed here?
lamia: chill and just smoke it.
me; i dont want to lamia
lamia: hey are you seriously quitting it?
me: yes!
lamia: okay just this time i dont want to be alone smoking its awkward
me: i huffed and took it from her, i just smoked half it and i gave her the rest.
but right then..
in that moment..
when i gave her..
when she just touched it..
we both heard a sound, not only a sound.. our principle voice.
and now we both know that we are in a very, very big and serious problem.
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